I am going to try and be more uptdate on this blog. i know its been a long time since I have written on it.
Back in January I had a mental breakdown. i was very suicidal and so brant brought me to the ER. they almost hospitlized me, but agreed I could go home as long as brant was there to watch me and give me my meds. i took a week off work untill the new meds kicked in.
ever since then things have been great in regards to my mood swings. i havn't even felt depressed since then. Even when lilia was admitted to the CCU a few weeks ago.
Although I did start binge eating, my meds and my PCOS made me gain weight even when i was staying strictly on WW. So i gave up and started biging. I lsot control and wasnt able to stick to WW at all...it did get me depressed. So last week i joined Over eats anon. it was great. made me realize that my over eating/binge eating is an illness, an addiction. Understanding that, has helped me so much. and i havnt binged since sunday. Even though i am really wanting to. its a hard addiction to break. But i will do my hardest. i really want to go back to losing weight. I can reach my goal eventually.
Now me and rbant have deicded to start ttcing our 4th and final child. Despite other ppl not agreeing that we should have anymore. Screw em, we are adults and we deicded what to do in our life.
So i start CLomid, in a couple weeks since i have PCOS I am not ovulating and will need to concieve this last child. Which sucks. but I am sure i will post a ton about that.
i am swtiching my meds too, to a med less likly to cause weight gain, and is better for a baby. so that and starting clomid i might be a little crazy. Baar with me lol.
