So I have been working on my physical health, my weight issues, for over a year now and its going pretty well. However Now I am tackiling soemthing even harder, somethig I have less control over. My mental health issues.
Ever since I can remember ZI have had huge issues with this, soemthing was obviosuly wrong with me at a young age. High school was hell, and then ebing on my own it only got worse. becuase of my severe ups and downs, they are thinking I might have bipolar disorder. I see a pyschtrist next week, I am hoping that I am not bipolar..however I want them to be able to help me in some way! I am tired of feeling so low that iw as to kill myself, that i take sleep meds and ativan jsut to function on those days. Its hurting my marriage, my friendships and my self esteem. I am afraid if its not fixed so, I wont last long enough to meet my grandchildren. My downs are coming more often, I am not myself during these times, i am mean, I am rude, I am the most negative person in the world, quick to anger and all ic an think about is slitting my wrists. I need support, getting help is a very hard think for me to be doing. But I know it needs to be done.
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